New England Patriots quarterback and health quack Tom Brady is decent at a lot of things: throwing a perfect spiral, coming back from 28-3 deficits, and leaving MAGA hats out for the press to see in his locker. Being a convincing human is not one of them. Throughout the Super Bowl media week, he’s been assuring reporters that he really does listen to music, name-checking Jay-Z, Coldplay, U2, Pearl Jam, and Kendrick Lamar as his favorite artists for getting focused before a game. (When Bleacher Report’s Natalie Weiner asked him to name some Kendrick songs, he.... had some trouble.) Those are certainly real and enjoyable artists, but also just incredibly boring picks to name-check as your favorites.
If Brady wants to broaden his palate a bit before the big game on Sunday (and why the hell should he), might we suggest checking out some artists from his own neck of the woods. In the sports world, Boston sucked for a while, then suddenly stopped sucking, and is now an unlikely hub of excellence that no one can really rival. Its music scene... has always been pretty good, even if it never quite reached the heights of a Nashville or a Seattle or a Philadelphia.
Below, he can start with a familiar song—Ozzy Osbourne’s “Crazy Train,” which the Patriots have been entering to for a while—and scan through Massachusetts’ finest, from the peak Aughts R&B of JoJo to emo revival heroes The Hotelier to the punishing metalcore of Converge if he really wants to run through a brick wall or something.