There are limits to one’s earthly powers. Before November 10th, 2017, one might have assumed that Beyoncé could musically do no wrong. The singer is practically untouchable. Sadly, even Beyoncé is human.
At noon today, Eminem released “Walk On Water,” a new single leading up to his upcoming album Revival. The horrible, no good, very bad song mostly sounds like a photocopy of a 2013 Macklemore and Ryan Lewis song without any earnest Mackling or any of the pop touches of Ryan Lewis. For the last decade, Eminem’s ham-fisted rapping style has sounded tired, but here, it’s truly dire, as Em sounds like he is just going through the motions and would rather be doing anything else.
Beyoncé to her credit does a fine job singing ridiculous platitudes (“I walk on water / But I ain’t no Jesus / I walk on water / But only when it freezes”), so if you wanna hear her part, check the tweet below. If you wanna hear the whole song, we believe in your ability to Google it.