In order of importance, here’s a list of Drake’s greatest loves: Toronto, the Toronto Raptors, Rihanna, Harry Potter, The Florida Project, and dancehall. Drake also loves Doris Burke, ESPN’s longtime sideline reporter and color analyst. Drake, however, will never be Doris Burke.
On Wednesday night, the Raptors beat a mediocre Charlotte Hornets team 126-113. As he is wont to do, Drake sat court side, and while I wasn’t watching the game I imagine he was doing the thing where he gets more riled up than the Raptors’ actual head coach, Dwane Casey, and nearly steps out onto the court. At one point during the game, the broadcast gave Drake a headset and let him crack some sideline jokes about Jeremy Lamb’s right calf tattoos and The DaVinci Code. Classic Drake shit:
But once the game was over, Drake assumed the role of postgame reporter. It didn’t go as well! He was talking to his pal, Raptors star guard (and star of my fantasy basketball team) Kyle Lowry, who put up a nice showing on Wednesday night—a season-high 36 points. Drake seemed a little more out of his element here, fumbling through Lowry’s stat-line a bit. The banter wasn’t quite effortless, and he didn’t seem to know where to hold the mic while Lowry was talking:
Reporting’s hard! Don’t fire journalists!